Will you write a new narrative?
Because the stories we tell ourselves, become the world we live in.
I’ve been thinking a lot about the phrase ‘ni de aqui, ni de alla,’ it means neither from here nor there. How for many of us who relate to this sentiment, we find a sense of belonging in not belonging…anywhere. In acknowledging the sometimes uncomfortable reality that all the parts of our self might not fit or be accepted by the human-constructed boxes of any given place.
On good days, my lived nuances feel universal. On bad days, I feel fragmented. I hate to admit that the scales have primarily tipped towards fragmented. And so I’ve dedicated years to pursuing the whispers of belonging, in hopes of finding wholeness. And it led me back to my roots. To the grit of the Andes mountains, to the vibrance of la Amazonia. To the shadows of my lineage and a resilience that keeps me humble. And with each abuela that spoke her secrets through my dreams, I swore to honor them.
I intentionally blocked blessings I perceived as threats. Threats to my cosmic connection to them. Threats to my belonging in this lineage. Threats to a camino of unearthing I believed to be the only way to mend together the fragmented parts of self.
And this last visit to Bolivia, when I heard my tia laugh, I heard the abuelas that whisper in my dreams sing the truth to me. I heard them sing of everything that we are. Of all their planted seeds, I’ve unknowingly watered. Of the only existing threat between me and them is my own mind. Of the only obstacle to wholeness is my own mind. Of the absolute freedom to write a new narrative.
That in fact, soy de aqui y soy de alla. Soy de mi sangre, y soy del espíritu. Soy. Somos. Que la liberación se encuentra más allá de la mente y identificaciones. Que quizas se encuentra bailando en liminalidad.
I believe the stories we tell ourselves, become the world we live in – on a personal and collective level. Have you discovered the narratives that keep you bound? The ones that insist you are fragmented? The ones with weight that keep you stagnant? A reminder– you have the power to rewrite the narrative. And if you are unable to discover it, do some digging. Unearth what lives in the soil from which the narrative is growing and cleanse it out.
Journaling Prompt:
What narrative in your life that feels limiting has the space to be rewritten?
What narrative in your life make you feel limitless?